my babies

my babies

Saturday, November 11, 2017

Journeys and Seasons

This year has been quite the journey for me.  As I look at the calendar and I see that this month is almost halfway gone and next month is December.....well goodbye 2017.  What a year this has been.  I got married to the love of my life....yes, even at this late date.  What a God-send this man has been.  The changes that he has brought to my life are too numerous for me to even name.  I am overwhelmed by him daily.  Not just for the love, security, consistency and all the other wonderful emotions that come with him but also for just the things that he does for me.  He makes me coffee.  He brings it to me while I am getting ready.  He helps me make the bed.  Around the house.  He goes to the store with me.  There are also things that I no longer have to do.  For the first time in years I am not getting in wheelbarrows of wood in the house each day for my old wood stove.  Praise the Lord for that!!!  Anyway, I took some time off this year from teaching the Wednesday night Ladies Bible Study.  that was kinda nice to just be a participant and not a leader.  But last Wednesday i started back and I have really missed that.  We are doing the new Beth Moore, The Quest, and it is so good.  I am only on day 2 of my homework but it is fabulous.  A quest is much different than a journey by the way.  A quest is an investigative type mission of a journey or walk.  A journey is a meandering trip that gets you places.  Life is a journey.  Seasons of your life are journeys.  They can be quests too.  When things or issues need to be dealt with specifically but seasons of your life are journey based.  At least I think so.  Am I making any sense at all??  The season I am in right now is one I am enjoying immensely.  We don't have any children in my house and that is tons of weight off of our shoulders.  We aren't rich but we can pay our bills and have a very secure life and I am so grateful and thankful for that.  I have struggled financially in the past and it is a huge burden.  I know the Lord takes care of His children.  I trust Him on that completely....I have seen His hand all over my finances in the past.  I am just blessed right blessed.  We get to watch our grandbabies grow up and experience life and change and do all the fun things they do.  To watch their journey is such a privilege and one I hope to continue to contribute to.   I so desperately want all my grandchildren to remember us as loving and safe and fun.  But mostly I desire for them to remember that we loved the Lord.  I pray for them daily.  Nothing ....absolutely nothing makes me feel at peace than to know that my children are walking with God.  Journeying with Him.  Not running from Him.  Avoiding Him but walking with Him.  That is a journey we are all on right now.  Those that are His.  If you belong to Christ then you are on a journey with Him.  Sometimes the terrain is rocky and hard and sometimes it is a vast, flat plain.  Or a dry desert.  Been there....many times.  But on our journey with Jesus the best part is....He is always there.  When I am running from Him....He is there.  When I am hiding....He is looking.  We cannot escape Him.  I do not know why we ever try to!  Anyway,  this Bible Study is already teaching me great things and I am loving it.  This journey I am on and this season I am in.....I'm loving it too.

Thursday, October 26, 2017

My new most favorite thing to do!

I do not ever claim to be computer/phone savvy but I am currently having a ball with Snapchat!  I do Instagram.  It's fun....just photos really.  Small captions, no big deal.  I do not do Facebook because ...well it's just too much information that for the most part is useless.  I honestly don't care if you are out to eat, have a runny nose, just got a dog, had diarrhea over the weekend, left your husband, went back home to him blah...blah...blah.  Get it??  But since my kids showed me how to use Snapchat???  I am obsessed.  I have a our four girls and three friends on it.  And me and my friend Kelley....we snap a billion times a day.  And it is hilarious.  I wish I knew how to put one on this blog because Lord-a-mercy I so would!  Kelley makes me laugh and laugh.  We go back and forth all the time.  And you know what?  It's free, fun and fast.  I send her a 20 second video or thought with a funny face and super cute accent and it brightens her day.  She sends me one and it brightens mine!  My friend Janet does it too and we have a blast.  In reality it does not take much to thrill me.  I have a fabulous life, fabulous husband, great kids and super sweet grand babies.  Snapchat?  It's icing on the cake, baby.  Is it silly?  Yep....but when you act old ... you are old.  We think it's fun and it is.  Just plain old fun.  My new fave....handsdown!

Monday, October 9, 2017

Learning To Worship

Yesterday at church we had a guest Pastor in to preach for the morning and evening services.  He was so good!  He was such a dynamic speaker and he really just did a great job.  His topic was on what worship really is.  I so needed to hear the things that God had for me through this message.  I have been struggling lately with just  a dry spell I have been having with the Lord.  The Lord is still there and I know that but it is me.  All me.  I am just dry right now and i just don't know why.  So yesterday I sensed a rekindling of a passion I haven't felt in a while.  To dive into His word and to sing with abandon.  To lift my hands in praise.  We sang the song "I Need You" and tears rolled down my face.  I often cry in the singing time because it moves my spirit so but yesterday I really did need the Lord.  And He showed up.  This Pastor spoke on using our common sense, our Godly sense and most importantly...our Obedience-Sense.  Therein lies my problem.  I don't obey.  I'm no better than my 5 year old grand daughter who gets in trouble for not obeying.  A lot.  When God wants me to act or do something a certain way I for the most part do not.  Or I grumble about it in my heart.  Where this attitude has come from I am not sure.  I can blame it on lots of things.  I am tired.  which I am.  I am over committed.  My job is stressful.  Family demands.  And the list goes on and on.  But it boils down to my own free will.  I choose to be disobedient.  I let the world get in the way and I let Cindy get in the way.  She is a willful one, that Cindy!  But I am starting afresh and thank you Jesus, He gives us a fresh pass each and every day.  I am learning to worship the Lord with all my heart, my mind and my soul.  To worship Him with all I do.  Now this doesn't mean I go about with my hands up and singing praise songs all the time.  It is an attitude of the heart that needs to be set in my steps.  Each task I do I can do it with an attitude of worship.  Is that hard?  You better believe it.  But it is what God wants and He will equip me if I don't act like such a ding dong and put on that bad attitude that I have been wearing as of late.  That attitude makes look fat, by the way.  Because my heart and mind sure have been heavy lately.  But I am learning to worship.  To listen more, to pray more to sit at the feet of Jesus more.  I believe that is all He wants out us anyway.

Wednesday, September 27, 2017

Hopping up on my trusty soapbox for a minute

Last weekend on all the NFL games I watched multiple players sit or kneel instead of standing for our national anthem.  My opinion is just that....mine.  So here goes.  Shame on you.  To do that to the honoring of our flag is not only disrespectful but just plain out ignorant.  Go to another country to play ball for 10 bazillion dollars a year where no young man (or woman) would risk their life to protect your freedoms.  The flag is so much more than just a piece of cloth waving in the wind.  It is a representation to the world of who and what we are.  And believe it or not...we are still the United States of America.  The best country in the world to live in.  Name me another one where I can kick or throw a ball for millions of dollars and have endorsements fall all over me for another several million dollars and be on the news every single day of my life if I make enough noise!  I love this country...even with all its faults.  I love it and am so grateful to live here.  When I witness all the wrongs in this country it doesn't make me hate my country.  It makes me hate the wrongs.  My daddy served in the Army and was in Korea.  I would never humiliate him by sitting during our national anthem.  He would wear me out and rightly so.  Have times changed since he served.  Yes they have.  some for the better and some for worse.  But this country is still worth standing up for.  The KKK, Nazi-right groups, white supremacists and Black Lives Matter are all hate groups.  All of them.  Peoples Lives matter.  All people.  To sit down right in front of a 70 year old veteran saluting our flag is a kick in the gut to all servicemen and women.   Grow up.  Do unfair things happen in this world.  Yes.  Is life fair to all people all the time?  No.  Deal with it.  When I see so called movie stars rant and rave about how much they hate our President and all the things he would like to see come to pass it makes me wonder....why do they not fix what is broken in their eyes?  Meryl Streep is rich enough to build 20 homeless shelters and to feed hungry children for years....She is just one of dozens who always seem to gripe and complain but never seem to do anything. I could honestly rant on and on about the so-called issues these flag hating, President hating people....but then I am the same as them.  All I know for sure is this....Jesus is coming back and then every knee will bow.  Every.  Single.  One. 

Sunday, September 17, 2017

Learning To Serve

This morning in church our Pastor preached on being a servant.  Serving is a hard word for us to relate to.  we all love to be served and we like it when others see us serve others.  But true servanthood is hard.  Doing the things that no one sees.  Filling in when needed for something we don't like or don't feel qualified to do.  We should not pick and choose our service to others because then let's face it....some stuff never would get picked.  Ideally their should not ever even be a need for people to jump in and do tasks.  But we all know that some people do tons of stuff and others do....well...nothing.  Why??  There are so many opportunities to serve the body of Christ and our local community that we could all find some place to serve.  But ultimately true servanthood begins within me.  Do I do things to be recognized and praised?  I hope I don't.  I really want to help and serve others out of love for them and for my savior, Jesus Christ.  He, alone, has given me the ability to do various things to serve others and if I don't use those abilities?  Well...that is really sin.  I have the same amount of time every other person has and what I do with it is up to me.  I go to work...I can serve there....I come home...I can serve there....I visit my parents, my kids, my in-laws...serving opportunities.  The Pastors' sermon really convicted me about m attitude towards serving.  Do I resent serving?  At times I do.  I'm tired for one thing.  I have lots of things on my plate right now.  But that really is no excuse.  I need to reorganize my time and my priorities and then I can be a better servant. Now we cannot serve everyone all the time and that is what makes the body of Christ so great.  If we all serve in some capacity we will get the job done.  At times we all need to be different parts of the body.  Sometimes you may be the hands and feet of Him. You will do the leg work.  Another time you may be the heart of Him and just pray.  Other times you may shoulders of Him and bear some heavy weight.  But we all can be something of Him.  Servanthood??  I'm still learning.

Monday, September 4, 2017

First Days

Last week was the first week of school here and my sweet Savannah started Kindergarten!  Piper started the second grad.....I can't believe that!  Time just goes way too fast.  Piper loves her teacher, Mrs. Dally, and she has a great little class of friends.  I am so glad she loves school and learning.  she really is so very smart and she tries to do her best all the time.  So proud!!  Savannah did fantastic.  I was really nervous that she would cry but she did not cry one bit!  I asked her at the end of the first day if she cried and she just beamed when she told me she didn't!  So proud of her too!  We have lots of new kids this year.  We have a new high school that opened for the first time right down the road from my elementary school and we are the feeder school for this high school.  so everyone wants to attend the new school.  Our enrollment really jumped with new people moving into our area.  The new high school is very nice and so state of the art.  Lots of incentives....makes me want to go back to school...not!  I loved school as a child but the thoughts of going back to school now make me want to cringe.  I love the little kids at elementary age level but I would never want to be a teenager again for no amount of money.  Just watching all the little ones and their excitement over seeing their friends again and playing together and eating lunch together is super sweet and fun.  I have already started to pick out the ones that i know need extra prayers.  I pray for my school and the children and staff there often but there are always those few that need extra prayers.  Some little ones just live hard lives.  So much weight on tiny shoulders that just should not be.  I am just so glad that my own grandbabies love their teachers and school and seem to be settling in just fine.

Erica bringing in the troops for the first day!

Sweet Piper hugging Savannah goodbye!

Getting all settled into her seat at her table.  All smiles!

Tuesday, August 22, 2017

Hard Prayers

Last week I had my "sisters" over for an evening of fun, fellowship and prayer time.  We have not gotten together in a while and it was a much needed night.  There were nine of us and all found show up and I know that was just a God-thing.  Our lives are all so busy and just full.  Most of us had "minor" prayer requests to share with the others and all of us had praises to offer but there were two of us that just broke my heart.  One of my sweet sisters is losing her husband to brain cancer.  Probably sooner than later.  She just broke down.  You see....they found each other later in life and after both had devastating divorces.  Both were single for many years but God brought them together and now....this.  She will most likely be a widow at just 57 years old.  The other sweet sister is a widow and has been for 4 years at the age of 54 she lost her high school sweetheart to cancer.  And the funny thing is these ladies have children that are now married to one another and a grandson they share.  God is teaching one to help the other through a horrible season.  My dear friend that is a widow also broke down.  She is so very lonely....a feeling I totally get.  But she has also never grieved her husband.  She has and is the "strong" one.  I totally get that too.  Now that I am in my 50's and have married the absolute love of my life my loneliness has dissolved and I cannot imagine life without my husband.  I just weep at the thought of going through that like my friends are and have.  That sounds so very selfish.  Why them and not me?  I don't know.  God is sovereign and He has a plan.  A good plan.  It may not seem good but that is what He always offers His children.  His plans are good.....because He is good.  These are hard prayers.  Hard.  Life on this earth is sometimes so very hard.  But this is not our home and truly we are passing through.  For the believer our home is with Jesus.  For eternity.  Forever.  As time here either drags by or flies it is still only temporary.  I was praying this morning for my friend because her husband is going to try one last treatment to give him a little more time.  What kind of time?  I don't know....just time.  My prayers were hard and I ended up saying to the Lord that I just didn't know how to pray.  The right words would not come.  I am so thankful that Jesus stands at the right hand of the Father to intercede for these hard prayers we send up.  So thankful.