my babies

my babies

Saturday, May 21, 2016

Climbing up on my soapbox....again

I have stated before that I work at an elementary school.  I love little kids.  They are so sweet and so funny.  You want the truth??  Ask a little kid.  You will get it every single time.  Not fancied up either!  But my problem is the parents and the current policies in our schools.  Not just public school either.  We are raising the most excused, self-entitled, arrogant selfish bunch of children I have ever witnessed to date.  All over my school hangs these little bags with Eagles in them.  If you see a child doing a good deed, or behaving or whatever...you are supposed to take one out and give it to them.  All staff is to participate in this program.  Herein lies the problem.  The good kids, the kids who never cause trouble, the kids who behave, the kids who just do the right thing....never get one!!!  Only the kids that are in constant trouble, have "issues" or are just a general pain get one.  We reward these kids because they are "standing in line without spinning!" or "you didn't hit anyone coming down the wall!" or "thank you for not running like a madman in the lunchroom!".  It is ridiculous!!!  What do the kids who just do the right thing get??  Nothing.  But with their little eyes they see the kids who misbehave get rewarded.  This is not right, people.  This past week my five year old grand daughter was threatened by a class mate that if she told on him for ripping up her shapes she and another little girl made out of play-doh.  A boy in her room when caught by the teacher ripping up their shapes told each little girl, "If you tell on me, you're dead!"  This did not sit well with me, or her parents....at all.  when brought before our current administration it was ignored and not dealt with at all.  This boy has home problems and all kinds of issues but that really is no excuse.  He is allowed to play all day because he doesn't really like school.  Plays with balls and generally does what he wants.  If he doesn't???  He pitches one more fit.  Now I see a problem here.  Do you?  If my grand daughter had made this threat she would have been suspended.  No doubt.  I see this all day long.  Kids whose home life is bad.  Or their mom is not in the picture or their dad or they live with grandma or blah...blah...blah.  My parents raised my niece and she turned out just fine.  Never violent or a trouble maker of any kind.  A ton of kids come from broken homes or all kinds of family scenarios.  They do just fine.  Kids with parents in prison??  We got them too.  Kids who are molested??  Several.  Kids that just have pitiful lives.  Tons.  This does not give them the right to be rewarded because of their circumstances.  Now I think all kids should be treated with respect, kindness and understanding.  But we are not doing them any favors by allowing them to get by with terrible behavior.  You should not be rewarded for "not" hitting anyone.  But just praised for making the correct choices.  You don;t get a sticker because you didn't throw your lunch tray at the lady who runs the dishwasher.  Whatever happened to just plain out behaving because that is the right thing??  Needless to say I have given out only one Eagle in my years of working at school.  One.  this year I saw a whole class just standing quietly while there teacher talked with an adult.  The whole class.  They were respectful, stood there quietly and facing the right way.  So I praised them and gave them one Eagle.  Parents we are not helping our kids by rewarding bad behavior.  this so called "positive reinforcement" does not work in the long run.  Prison is full of people who were never told "No, we don't do that."  In about 15 - 20 years we are going to be so sorry we allowed this behavior to slip by.  So sorry.  I do feel sorry for kids who just have lives that are just crummy.  But I know that the majority of these kids don't act up.  there are also many kids who are hellions with great homes.  Both parents home, no money issues, plenty of everything around....and they are little terrors.  They are excused to act the way they are because no one wants to correct them or hurt their feelings.  They have everything but time.  Parents take the time to love and discipline your children!  For this, you will not be sorry....I promise.

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