my babies

my babies

Saturday, September 6, 2014

Not really goodbye...

The funeral for Pastor Randy was today.  As far as funerals go it was a really nice one.  I, myself, am not a fan of funerals or for funeral homes.  My friend Kelley and I have a pact and I know she will do her part and I will do mine.  The family broke my heart.  Especially Kim, his wife.  She just lingered by the casket and then kind of just melted on the pew.  The pastors spoke some.  Then there was some singing.  And during the singing rose this small, fragile hand.  Praising her God.  Kim was praising God during this storm.  That was not the song being sung but I watched a wife praising her God while her husbands body lay enclosed before her.  My mind wandered to random thoughts.  No more on this earth will she call him to supper.  No more will she reach for him in the night just to make sure he is there.  No more will she fuss about socks that do not make it to the hamper.  No more will she exchange those secret looks that long timed married folks pass between each other in various situations.  You know...family get-togethers with "those" members etc...  No more will she tell her kids to go ask your father.  Just a lot of different scenarios went through my head.  Just the day to day stuff that we all take for granted with everyone in our lives.  But still she raised her hand to praise her God.  My God.  And I hope your God too.  Do I understand any of this??  No.  Is He still God??  Yes.  And He is good.  I watched Randy's children.  Grieve.  Cry.  And later....laugh.  Friends came by.  Hugged them all.  Loved on them.  My church really steps up in a crisis time.  We fed them and helped them.  We prayed with them.  We cried with them.  We laughed with them.  Life, after all, goes on.  Does the world stop for our hurts?  We would like to think so but it does not.  Tomorrow will come and the next day and so on.  The kids will go back to school.  Kim will go back to work.  The hole in their lives will remain.  Things will be different.  I have a friend who says she does not like"the new normal" that has invaded her life since she lost her own father.  I have gotten used to a new normal in  my own life.  Most of my friends over the last few years have had to make some major adjustments to a "new normal".  Today at this funeral for a dear, kind man my Pastor said that for the believer...we will see Randy again.  Kim will.  Her children will see their daddy again.  It's not really goodbye but see you...soon.

No comments: