my babies

my babies

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Looking Back...Looking Ahead...

There is less than a week left in 2010. Less. Than. A. Week..... Did that sink in?? This has been the longest and yet the fastest year in my life. Unreal. I think it is natural, as people, to look back and think on things, situations, events and actions (plus reactions) of our lives. As a thinker (hello, Tracy) I tend to over analyze every nuance there is to any given situation. I love dissection and nit-picking. I think it should be a college major of which I would already have my doctorate in and therefore I could instruct. Giving up my control issues are obviously not on my "I Resolve To" list. But this year I have decided to not really dig into looking back. At least not on the yucky stuff. I have found out that if I keep rehashing all the stuff that was just horrible this year it will begin to gnaw at my inner-most being. That way down deep part each of us has that we store hidden things. I don't want to fill that part up with yuck...I want to fill it up with Jesus and all He has to give us. To give me. That is not a selfish desire either. The Word says in Psalms: "Delight yourself in me (God) and I will give you the desires of your heart." This doesn't mean new cars, big houses or fat checkbooks. This means when I delight or spend real time with God my desires will be His desires for me. Jeremiah tells us that He has plans for me...and for you. Is that not exciting?? It should be. I really don't have a clue what 2011 holds for my family but I know that it really doesn't matter. God knows and He holds me and my little nest in His mighty hands. That is a future I can lay back and rest in. Sure, I have dreams that I would love to see come to fruition. Big dreams and some little ones. I dream that Megan graduates and finds the job of her dreams that she loves and excels at. I dream that Erica and Blake grow in their marriage and raise their sweet baby girl. I dream that both my children love and serve the Lord out of desire and not out of guilt or a legalistic attitude of "have to". I dream they seek Him daily and see their own desires become what the Lord desires for their lives. And if we are being honest, I dream that I would take that step out of my comfort zone and do whatever the Lord shows me without having to drag me to it and through it. Does that make sense?? So this year I resolve to look ahead..... What about you?

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