my babies

my babies

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

What I (and a few others) Want

Hey Y'all,

Pull up a chair. Put your feet up. Cross your arms over your chest. Stick out your lower lip. Take a deeeeep breath.....furiously blow it out. Official pout stance? Check. I have been having a humongous, gigantic pity party as of late. I have been in a frenzy with my emotions. I have been in a tailspin that is getting out of control. I feel as if I am about to either explode or implode. I also am not sure which one would be worse or better at this point. What I want is a Defender. You know, the cape, the muscles, the wavy black hair....wait that's Superman. He would do. Batman also. Even Spiderman. But alas, sweet ladies....there are no superheroes. None. I still want a defender. Recently there has been an onslaught of offenses towards me that I am just barely able to stand. I am shocked and in tears so often that I ran out of kleenex last night. As a hoarder...I never run out of anything. I'll talk on that at a later date. Anyway. I spoke (whined rather) with a dear friend last night about how I so wanted a defender to ease the pain of all the offenses I have endured over the last several months. I want someone to stand up for me and say, "Are you crazy...don't say that.... Better than that I really want some lights knocked out. Just being real here. While doing my new Bible study today, Jonah by Priscilla Shirer. Fabulous!!!! The Lord showed me a familiar verse. How often is the familiar new????

Proverbs 3:5 "Lean on. trust in, and be confident in the LORD with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding."

Wow! It just hit me at that moment. I don't have to understand .... anything. God sees. He IS El Roi. The God who sees. He understands. I cannot trust my own understanding, insight or feelings.

He is my Defender. Period.

Bless You!!!


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